Saturday, February 7, 2009

Why I Fired My Secretary

A Birthday Story
.

Last week was my birthday
 and I didn’t feel very well
 waking up on that morning.
 
 I went downstairs for breakfast
 hoping my wife would be pleasant and say,
 ”Happy Birthday!”,
 and possibly have a small present for me.
 
 As it turned out,
 she barely said good morning,
 let alone
 ” Happy Birthday.”
 
 I thought…
 Well,
 that’s marriage for you,
 but the kids….
 They will remember.
 
 My kids came bounding down stairs to breakfast,
 and didn’t say a word.
 So when I left for the office,
 I felt pretty low,
 and somewhat despondent.
 
 
 As I walked into my office,
 my secretary, Jane, said,
 ”Good Morning Boss,
 and by the way,
 Happy Birthday ! “
 It felt a little better
 that at least someone had remembered.
 
 
 I worked until one o’clock ,
 when Jane knocked on my door
 and said, “You know,
 It’s such a beautiful day outside,
 and it is your Birthday,
 what do you say we go out to lunch,
 just you and me.”
 I said, “Thanks, Jane,
 that’s the greatest thing
 I’ve heard all day.
 Let’s go !”
 
 We went to lunch.
 But we didn’t go
 where we normally would go.
 She chose instead a quiet bistro
 with a private table.
 We had two martinis each,
 and I enjoyed the meal tremendously.
 
 On the way back to the office,
 Jane said, “You know,
 It’s such a beautiful day…
 We don’t need to go straight back to the office,
 Do We ?”
 
 I responded,
 ”I guess not.
 What do you have in mind ?”
 She said,
 ”Let’s drop by my apartment,
 it’s just around the corner.”
 
 After arriving at her apartment,
 Jane turned to me and said,
 ” Boss, if you don’t mind,
 I’m going to step into the bedroom
 for just a moment.
 I’ll be right back.”
 
 ”Ok.”I nervously replied.
 
 She went into the bedroom and,
 after a couple of minutes,
 she came out
 carrying a huge birthday cake …
 Followed
 by my wife,
 my kids,
 and dozens of my friends
 and co-workers,
 all singing “Happy Birthday”.
 
 And I just sat there…
 
 On the couch…
 

 Naked.

.

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