I Wonder ... What's Rule # 2?

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It will be hard,

but I think I can follow that rule.

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Why Some Men Prefer Dogs Over Women

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1. The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.

2. Dogs don’t notice if you call them by another dog’s name.

3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.

4. A dog’s parents never visit.

5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.

6. You never have to wait for a dog; they’re ready to go 24 hours a day.

7. Dogs find you amusing when you’re drunk.

8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.

9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, ‘If I died, would you get another dog?’

10. If a dog has babies, you can put an ad in the paper and give them away.

11. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.

12. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don’t get mad. They just think it’s interesting.

13. Dogs like to ride in the back of a pickup truck.

14. If a dog leaves, it won’t take half of your stuff.

15. A dog will fetch you a beer and not complain about it

What's New Pussycat? Whoa-o-o-o

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Just Married

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It was a double ceremony

with

Mr. and Mrs. Ball - Grabber.

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Thank God You Posted A Warning ...

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... or I might have stripped off all of my clothes,

dove in

and went for a luxurious swim.

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Just Married

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It was a double ceremony

with

Mr. and Mrs. Nut - House

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Earth Hour 2009

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Last night in New York City at 8:30 PM.

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Do You Have A Dirty Mind?

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I could say a million things,

but I will leave it all up to your imagination.

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Location, Location, Location

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Every successful business

starts out

by opening

in the right place

at the right time.

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Just Married

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It was a double ceremony

with

Mr. and Mrs. Assbe - Dragon.

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And Newspapers Wonder Why Readership Is Down

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"The Moron Times"

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I was going to say something funny here,

but my pure exasperation

for the utter lack of intelligence

in today's news world

leaves me speechless.

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Imagine that,

me with nothing to say.

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Do It In The Dark

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Turn off all of your lights tonight between 8:30 and 9:30 to do a little bit for global warming. Last year 50 million people participated in "Earth Hour".

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Vice Versa

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It would take a whole lot of liquor

to make a man want

to touch your lips, ladies.

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Tuesday's Child Is Full Of Grace

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What If God Were One Of Us

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I didn't know Jesus drove a minivan.

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Party Animal

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That hit the spot.

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Fresh Out Of The Convent

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Just so you know,

too much eye makeup

can make you look like a slut.

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This Is How I Feel

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I ate too much good food while on vacation

and I now feel like a beached whale.

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Mom, Charley And Me

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From our visit to Ohio.

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God Bless Aqua-net

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To make it through the dreariness of her boring day,

Mary would take a swig of vodka every now and then.

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She hid the bottle in her hair.

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Do You Remember You First Teddy Bear?

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My 1st teddy was named "Betty"

and I still have her.

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The Sanctity Of Marriage Part 3

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I may be a little bit ignorant on the subject.

Could someone please explain this to me.

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How exactly does letting a gay person

marry the one that they love

destroy the sacredness of holy matrimony.

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Is it just me or has that battle already been lost?

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Copy-Cat

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Can You Guess Which Student ...

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is the star player on the team?

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Loyalty

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You will notice that the one

who vowed to honor in

"sickness and in health"

is no where to be seen.

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His And Hers Snacks

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Something For Everyone

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Playing With Your Food Is A No-No

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I'm Back

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We had a nice vacation in Ohio visiting the family.

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I will post stuff about the trip tomorrow night.

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Happy Birthday Mom

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We got her a little something to sit on her desk.

I hope she puts it to good use.

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Happy St. Patrick's Day

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Don't forget to wear Green today

or

you might get a pinch.

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Tender Vittles

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Freedom Is Mine

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He thought he was about to get a taste of freedom,

but Karma had a different flavor coming his way.

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What's For Dinner?

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Mom!!!!

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Is that you?

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